Here’s the kind of haunted house you have been waiting for—one that would definitely be rated R. It’s called Chambers of Horror, and it’s open for bloody business in Atlanta, GA ever night, now through Halloween.

The setup is that you’re taking a tour through a company called TortureCo, to decide if you want to pay to torture someone or to be tortured yourself. As you can imagine, it’s gory, violent and perverted. So yes, I loved it! I get tired of haunted houses that offer just a mishmash of FX and props with no theme. This one has a theme, and sticks to it. It’s great how the actors in the haunt curse at you as well. It’s always a buzzkill going to a haunted attraction, and the first thing you are told before you go in is “No cursing.” This can ruin the experience before I even enter the place, because I’m worried that I’ll piss off a demon or ghoul with profanity. Hello? That makes no sense; if something jumps out at me in real life, I curse. But Chambers gives it to you, and it’s awesome. This is not your father’s haunted house…or your mother’s or your kids’. Go to CHAMBERS OF HORROR and get the shit scared out of you!

Some facts from my visit:

1) I got called a bitch, and loved it.

2) A boob was cut off and thrown at me.

3) PG haunted houses are for nerds.

4) The best part of the night happened on the way back to the car, when my group debated over which one of us got pissed on during the tour.

5) Chambers of Horror is located in this old-ass refrigeration building. Which is amazing, because the set is not fake; it’s a real creepy-ass structure, not a closed-down Circuit City. How scared can you be in one of those? I’d be looking for deals in there, not scares. If a set is real, then it dresses itself.

See the trailer below, and Chambers’ official website here.

 

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