I was sitting at my desk one day when a package arrived, addressed to the FANGORIA Film Fest and myself. Inside were seven short films, one of which was called THE KILLER KRAPPER. OK, I’ll admit that intrigued me since I love bathroom humor, and I thought to myself, “Anyone who calls their film THE KILLER KRAPPER is likely OK with me.” Little did I know just what I was in for!

In the bunch was another film, this one called PERVULA: HE WANTS TO SUCK YOUR…! Thrilled with the title, I quickly inserted PERVULA into my machine and sat back to watch. What I saw was the single most hilarious short film I had ever seen. I started to laugh, and quite loud. Then I ran to share it with my boss, FANGORIA owner Tom DeFeo. Just watching Tom and listening to his comments on PERVULA had me in massive hysteria. I wasn’t sure at that point if it was the movie or my boss’ reaction. Tom is the king of bathroom humor, and his comments were just as hilarious as the film itself. Soon, people from all over the office were peeking in to see what all the hysteria was about. I told them we were watching PERVULA, and suddenly everyone wanted to see the movie. I had made it famous. Then we had a screening and soon enough, everyone was laughing and buzzing about PERVULA.

PERVULA is the brainchild of Armando D. Munoz at EEK Entertainment. Even calling his film company EEK makes me giggle. Its title obviously a combination of the words perverted and Dracula, thus a perverted Dracula, PERVULA unfolds in black and white, which is an amazingly clever way to disguise shooting on video. There are cards with type and tiny obscene graphics to move the story along, a nasty tribute to the silent film. The story goes like this: A beautiful blonde woman is hanging around her apartment when suddenly Dracula, I mean Pervula, appears. His face is made up of a scary pillow, his nails are curly long and he is obsessed with smelling panties. This obsession gives him a hard-on which we see as he walks from side to side. Then he does a burlesque dance—with his hard-on in tow. The rest I will merely let you see for yourself below, since FANGORIA has the exclusive on-line rights to the film.

It isn’t just me: After many years, PERVULA has continued to win countless awards at many film festivals, such as the Jury Prize at the Fearless Tales Genre Fest, Best Screenplay at Horror Dance and Most Perverted Film at the Sick Puppy Festival—just to name a few. And most of all, there’s the Marla Newborn Best Bathroom Humor Prize at the FANGORIA Office Screening Festival.

I wrote to Munoz to tell him I loved his sense of humor and ask how he came up with stories such as PERVULA, KILLER KRAPPER and PANTY KILL. Munoz responds, “As a fear filmmaker, I certainly want to make audiences jump and scream, squirm, gasp, gag and puke—and a squirt of pee in shocked hilarity from time to time.” Well, he succeeds at all that. So I ask how he specifically developed PERVULA. Munoz answers, “Legend has it that PERVULA was a reel of Super-8 film found buried at the bottom of F.W. Murnau’s panty drawer after he died. Because it’s fashioned in the silent-era style, PERVULA is one film that isn’t filled to bursting with splatter and ultraviolence. Still, I’m a sucker for a good gross-out, so I substituted all of the blood and guts with chunky barf, stinky super-farts and other bodily fluids and excretions. Just as Murnau would, right?”

Beautiful. We all love bodily fluids. At least I do. But what about the panties? What’s up with the panties!? Munoz continues, “Panties have played a major role in many of my films; the first appearance was a thong on an unfortunate victim fleeing from a rampaging toilet in my first film THE KILLER KRAPPER. Plenty of panties are eaten, spanked and stretched beyond their limits during PERVULA’S modest running time. Panties finally become the title character in PANTY KILL [“The panty count continues…”], which chronicles a night of underpants slaughter in the suburbs, committed by a killer known as Crotchless Panty Face. I probably spend more on panties in my movies than I spend on catering. They are cheaper than actors, and easier to feed.

“Horror films are usually populated with pretty victims,” Munoz adds. “It’s just more tragic when a sexy, young woman or handsome guy comes to a messy, premature end. Well, sometimes, pretty panties have to die young too. Silk panties, lace panties, cotton butt-huggers, butt-floss, speedos, granny panties…NOW NO UNDERPANTS ARE SAFE! Excuse me…”

So all this leaves me to wonder: What’s Pervula’s next step? Munoz reflects, “After years of film-festival hauntings, PERVULA is being assembled into an anthology feature with my other short sickies: THE KILLER KRAPPER, MIME AFTER MIDNIGHT (SILENT…BUT DEADLY!), THE TERRIBLE OLD TRAN and PANTY KILL.” In addition, Munoz is currently developing a new horror franchise which will feature even more of the perversities that quite frankly make him Armando Munoz! As usual, he will take us to terrifying and new naked levels: “I’m going to scare the audience’s clothes off,” he promises!

And there you have it: The funniest, sickest, mos t absurd bathroom horror/humor that makes Adult Swim look like Disney.

And now, for your pleasure and exclusively on FANGORIA.com, we present PERVULA…

 

 

 

---

Bloody Blogs - Newborn Dead